Give batched cocktails a chance

Here’s my hot take: Batched cocktails are a gift to cocktail lovers and bartenders everywhere.

For some reason, when I say “batched cocktails” people tend to respond with a variation of moans, grunts and “ew is it from a can?” There is a public perception that batched cocktails are somehow a lazier, more generic version of a made-to-order, classic cocktail. They are not!

In a bid to make more people celebrate this overlooked method, I’ve written a what-why-where of batched cocktails.

What is a batched cocktail?

Firstly, they are not from a can. That is a “canned cocktail” (obviously) and is an entirely different thing that I will not be devoting time to (sorry not sorry). Batched cocktails are prepared ahead of time and work best with spirit forward recipes that don’t contain fresh fruit juice.

Preparing these before service allows the bartender to accurately measure, taste, adjust and (most importantly) standardise their recipe so that your dirty martini is a perfect salty velvet every damn time. A good batched cocktail should be ice cold, balanced and taste exactly the same as the last one you had.

Why are they important and seriously overlooked?

Have you ever gone to your favourite bar, ordered your usual drink and been sorely disappointed? I have. That’s because with classic cocktails like a Negroni, martini, Boulevardier, Old Fashioned or espresso martini – anything spirit forward – no two bartenders make it the same way. Even if it’s something standard like a Negroni with a 3:1 ratio of gin, vermouth and Campari, bartenders can always slip up, stirring a drink for a second too long or pouring a fraction more of something and ruining the drink’s balance.

If you can guarantee that every single time you go to your local, your bartender will be there to make your favourite version of {insert cocktail here} then I am very happy for you. But I know for sure that every time I go to the Gin Bar on Wale Street, Noel isn’t going to be there to make me a dirty martini the way I like it. Even worse, what happens if Noel gets another job? Provisions need to be made for when this day comes.

Where to find a good batched cocktail in Cape Town?

By now you’ve probably gleaned that I really love dirty martinis. I’ve had many incredible martinis. I’ve also had many very, very bad ones. The terrible experiences have taught me a very important lesson:

Martini time is sacred. DO NOT WASTE IT ON EXPERIMENTING WITH AN UNKNOWN BAR/BARTENDER.

I’ve already revealed my go-to spot for a made-to-order martini – the Gin Bar, no surprises there. But when I heard about Hope Provisions opening a bar on Park Road, I immediately knew they’d be pouring a good one. You can’t be a gin and vodka distillery and not know how to make a decent martini.

What to order at Hope Provisions on Park Road?

When I went the first time, I was delighted to hear that their martinis are batched! They serve three different kinds – dirty, dry and vesper. If you want to try all of them, they do a tasting flight, or you could go straight for a full size number which is what I did. The dirty martini is briny, velvety and so smooth, but to my surprise, the vesper stole the show. Part gin, part vodka with a twist, it’s super clean with the subtlest hint of lemon. A vesper is now my first martini-of-the-night choice, before I move onto the filthier option.

Hope Provisions doesn’t just batch their martinis, oh no! They actually batch all of their cocktails. They do a delightful clarified margarita which tastes like summertime in that it tastes like an ice cold tequila lime and soda from a flask on the beach.

They also do three different types of Negronis made with in-house gin and sweet vermouth, as well as their own version of Campari. I highly recommend trying their negroni tasting flight so you can taste all three and see how different they are from each other. I was particularly taken by the Negoni Rosato, which is perfumey and floral with a rosewater and bitter orange aftertaste. Their Negroni Pepe Rosa is peppery and robust and perfect for a cooler evening when you want something with a bit more heft.

If you’re a cocktail lover who hates drinking a terrible cocktail (which should be all of us, we deserve more!) treat yourself to a good batched drink once in a while. Bartenders are human and ingredients don’t always taste the same from one day to the next. Don’t gamble with that precious moment at the end of your day. Treat it with respect. Give it a decent drink.